11.5.10

No Space

I'm a fourth of the way through reading No Logo by Naomi Klein. It's crazy. I did not really realize how much brands surround us. It's sick. I don't even know if I want to wear my Nike's anymore. Or my converses. I feel like flipping through the latest issue of Adbusters while simultaneously giving the entire corporate world my middle finger. It's difficult to understand how it's possible for all this bullshit to take place. Then again, just a few years ago, I was in the mix of it too. I'd like to think that, like she said, I was more of the detached type. Kinda spitting in their faces and sporting their brands at the same time. I don't know. I know I like the finer things in life but what are the finer things? It's hard to say because our generation has been branded since birth. Literally. Since as long as I can remember, I knew what was cool. And what was cool had a brand. And that brand was a way of life. I can't say I wasn't influenced. I mean, I loved the quote "I'm like Che Guevara with bling on, I'm complex." Now I wonder if that made me complex or retarded? I also don't get why these people in power, mostly, corporate america, carry on the way they do. Do they realize what they're doing? And what are they doing it for, really? For money? So they can buy more of the the bullshit they themselves and their douche-bag competitors brand? They're constantly chasing the cool, and I guess they need to sell more of their image, brand or whatever the fuck because they themselves need to get more of their own and other brands while there are people in the world dying for food. Dying for water. We're making a living. No. We're making a dying because we need that new car, those new shoes. Give me a break. Brands in schools and other public domains are pollution. Give me graffiti or wack ass art. At least they're not trying to make me feel incomplete. What makes it worse is that the drug companies aren't any different. They make us think that we need their brands because, without them, you're ill. Then we go around believing we need something to survive. Wake up! As a species, we've made it a few thousnd years without this nonsense. I think we'll be alright. "But no, I need this pill to lower my blood pressure." Bitch, go out and take a walk!

It's okay to want certain things in life, don't get it twisted. I want many things, but I try not to
confuse them as being needs and I try to understand why I want those things. That's the problem, I don't think most consumers think. They do what they do best. Consume. I hate that I'm a consumer. If you think about it, that word itself is scary. But to thrive we must consume. As I sit here and type, I consume. When I hop on that flight to escape my bubble, I fund mass pollution. It sucks but it doesn't have to remain this way. It's cool to consume if we're conscious of it and find ways to make it a good thing. Like the way plants do. They're good role models. They make the best with what they've been given. They consume sunlight for energy. We provide them with more than enough carbon dioxide and they happily consume it, using that carbon as their building blocks and they even go one step further by providing us with oxygen in the process. Can't you see why I'm a tree hugger?

6.5.10

Not a thing to do. How lovely.




Walked down this path for the last time on Tuesday. Peace U Stay Forever, but not me. It's been good.

19.4.10

kitchen talk

Discussion over breakfast one morning with mom. (where's the meatloaf?!) It was April 16th, 2010 I believe.


"...That's not how we were raised. It's about going to school to work in a field where jobs are easy to find."
"What? No. It's not always about what's easy."
"But it is. At least at first. You work some stable job, save money, and then.."
"And then what?? Then for the rest of your life, you dream? About doing something else? For some, that might be the easy. But for me, it's not."
"Yeah.." as if in agreement, but not really.
Under our breath we laugh. Then sit. Both of us. Silent. Just thinking.

Conversations can be funny like that sometimes. No real conclusion.
I love you, ma!

13.4.10

look what the cat dragged in

That's what I'm talking about.

in case it doesn't rise tomorrow

Sunrise. Tea. Writing. They're cool and all but with you, it'd be perfect..

24.3.10

we're clever but we're clueless. we're just human...we are shadows...

3.3.10 Watched Art & Copy at Tampa Theatre

Are ads art? I don't know. I do know that sometimes they entertain me. Sometimes they influence me to buy things. Sometimes they make me feel. Many times they annoy me. These are all characteristics of most man-made things I observe. In moderation, they're cool I suppose. Not sure if that makes them art, or just artful. Whatever. I really like the last photo for some reason.

22.3.10

you can tell by my attitude, that I'm most definitely

2.2010

I was born in NY but I'm a Floridian. I can't lie. That cold stuff is cool to visit, but I need heat. I require plenty of sun and plenty of water. The subways do, however, feel more liberating than having a car. If you think about it, adequate public transit allows your feet to take you anywhere. Too bad Florida is naturally a swamp. Maybe we can get some bus thing going on or even light rail. Maybe we can just build closer together and instead of everyone having a small backyard that they hardly use, we can share parks. Forget subdivisions. They divide us. What ever happened to communities?

3.3.10

adskbnlkj

Just woke up from a nap. It felt so good. Now back to studying.

more than this

Good morning.

I have yet to sleep. How do I know whether I'm awake or not? If I'm dreaming, this is a nightmare. If I'm not, I must study. Without those little numbers on the bottom right of the screen, I would have no sense of time.

Fluorescent lights should be outlawed. Banned. Uninvented or something. That way I will never be able to stay up so long again. But thanks to whoever invented them. Circadian rhythm? No such thing. Mine is more off than Filipino moms clapping on beat.

I don't sleep,

'cause sleep is the cousin of death.
- n. jones
At school, studying with sway dizzle. My heart's racing. Caffeine's got me wired. I'm learning about pedigrees and micro arrays. I should have studied over the weekend but I was sorta in New York. Well, I did study over the weekend for my physio/pharm exam that I was late to on Monday. I'm not a betting man, but I'd bet your life that I failed that exam. Oh well, nothing I can do about it though so it's on to the next one. By the way, much love and thanks to Gabrielle, Snowbordo and the entire fam for assuring fun randomness during my mini vacay. Wait, what am I saying? I forget that I'm high off the life. This kid is on a permanent vacay.

At the moment, my motivation to keep grinding is pizza and a movie tomorrow. I can't wait. But if you're my friend, please remind me to never, ever, wait 'til last minute again. All nighters might cause me to leave the world with a good looking corpse. I'd rather not.

1.3.10

it's been a long night in New York

Rica,
Thanks! Sorry that we stressed you out some. With my hurricane of upcoming exams I knew I shouldn't have joined Mateo either but I'm glad I did. It's always fun and interesting when we all get together so you should already know that we are happy simply hanging at your house or any random place as long as it's together. Who would have thought that we'd take a limo through the city on the way to The Park and then be tempted to dip in a random hot tub turned up to 500 degrees (probably to kill all the goodies left behind by other random drunkards.) I never thought I'd be hit on by so many dudes in one night either. Oh and the amazing food at 4am. What wonderful white sauce! We had fun and I hope you did too. If we threw you off on school stuff, whatever, it was worth it. Sorry about it though. We intend to rub off on you some, but never in a bad way. But I guess the majority of our tendencies are considered bad by "normal" standards but what the f is normal anyway? No such thing. It's good to live a little. What's life with no fun?

"When making your choice in life, do not neglect to live."
--Samuel Johnson

23.2.10

haunted... like The Dakota,

Where John Lennon was shot.
- n. Jones
Thank you snow and thank you U.S. Airways. Due to the impending weather, I will not have to wake up at 3AM to catch a 5AM flight and I get to be in New York an extra night. Even though I'll be doing the same thing there that I would be doing here, studying, at least I'll be in that New York State of mind. My hopes go out to my fellow travelers tomorrow. See you soon. Don't worry, the streets will make you feel brand new.

Suede Timbs on my feet make my cipher complete.
- n. Jones

the night, the grind...

Empty bottles of no doz.
- k. West

A vice of mine.

better drink a red bull,
you can't sleep on life!
- j. Jenkins

All nighters - I've never been too fond of. Many of the >30 year olds I know suffer from insomnia, which is why I happily sleep as much as possible, when possible. But, some nights, pills must be popped. It's funny though, because there are nights where I can stay up without any stimulants. Nights when I hang out with friends, cause trouble, consume depressants and partake in all sorts of senselessness. With studying though, stimulants are necessary. Does that make me an addict? I think not although my personality is addictive.

16.2.10

chance has no memory

A professor in my Genomics class said this. He was referring to hereditary probabilities but when I heard it, my mind wandered. Is it better to be lucky or good? Images from 2010's best worst week thus far floated around my head.

Gasparilla Gone Bad. Unnecessary, sporadic arrests. And this is where my taxes go?
By chance, I was rear ended. By chance, I was handed two tickets by a generous officer for going with the flow of traffic. By chance I drove two hours to watch a space shuttle not lift off - all within days.

But also by chance, I have friends, family, and food that make life a bit sweeter. And I'll be chillaxing in the Empire State next week. Perhaps freezing is more appropriate. It will be a damn good time regardless. Luckily overall, I have been, and I hope to remain, lucky my entire life.
The man who said "I'd rather be lucky than good" saw deeply into life. People are afraid to face how great a part of life is dependent on luck. It's scary to think so much is out of one's control. There are moments in a match when the ball hits the top of the net and for a split second it can either go forward or fall back. With a little luck it goes forward and you win. Or maybe it doesn't and you lose.
- Match Point

I like the movie and the quote. I don't think it's scary though. Not having full control over how the ball falls makes things fun. Embrace uncertainty, it's one of the few things promised to us. Whichever way the ball falls, be happy to have played. Life's short. Ulcers suck. Let that which does not matter slide and you will be one step closer to tranquility.

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